My Story

Cambridge MA, ’71. Born in winter to a 6’1″ buxom beauty and a long hair never-to-be artist and musician she met in Harv Sq.
My mothers family: Grandparents met in the Marines where the joke was that grandma was a higher rank. Grandma from MA, Grandfather from New Orleans. My maternal four great grand parents were all sponsored and worked in wealthy homes in New Orleans and Weston. My painfully Irish Catholic maternal grandmother was an extremely talented sketch artist, with the hands of a draftsman. Sadly in her time one must marry and have a family.
Being kept from success in the arts seems pivotal to the control of the members of my maternal family members. Once as a child I simply signed a picture and my mother said it was a sign of seeking attention. This sort of destructive treatment within my maternal family is intergenerational and makes the perps look simple.
My mother lies (or her alter tells the truth) and tries to claim that she never wanted to crush my creative spirit over the years. Nothing could be further from the truth. And I never let her either and it will never happen..ever.
People from pedophile families often lie to themselves regularly in order to survive the things they do or have to do to others to survive. I never tolerated this and me using critical thinking was considered “making waves in The Family” (it often felt my mother fancied her family like a mafia family..hmph. They aren’t Italians..believe me.) So if ever I was to show a personality of my own, what my mother was doing mentally is putting the whole family against me in the situation. She did this when she could not dominate me on her own.
If I tried to have intellectual discussions the response was an in your face “NOW you sound like ya fatha” from my grandmother. And of course he was such a bad guy..are you seeing the construction of the mental and emotional prison yet? This is typical of controlling families or families with something to hide.

Father’s family are supposedly just carpenters but always there was talk of some Mafia nonsense which I am personally sick of. At one year old my mother left my father and I went into a foster home for 5 years.
My fathers family never wrote or saw me until I tracked them down in 1990. Never allowed to see my father or speak to him. I spoke to some girlfriend he had in Florida or New Orleans when he lived there. There was talk then that he had lost his mind, but his family who I were dealing with were always…crazy themselves and very shady. VERY shady.
I did notice one thing about my dad’s father…he hardly spoke and when he did it didnt make much sense. However, later I found he , being of Eastern european extraction, possessed some impressive psychic ability. He was a painter and a carpenter.
My paternal aunts and uncles seemed unsavory as well.
My aunt and her husband invited me to live with them and spoiled me but I found out it was all in the interest of trying to con me into going into business school becuz “That is where the money is”…but I was told I would be given an education of my choice. Her brother said that I was her “Little project”. I was not ready to be treated well after years of my mothers family being controlling and abusive.
I also had enough of this controlling bs and disrespect so I rebellled like any healthy ARTIST BY NATURE of 21years is going to.
That is the last I really dealt with them and my mother, who is a snake by nature, took my hard earned investigation’s findings about my family and reestablished contact and continued to speak to my paternal aunt behind my back, using anything she could find out about my father against me in future dealings. She would be given info about my father and never tell me but inform my maternal grandmother and others. This is typical of the central control type of enviorment in my abusive and controlling maternal family.

As I mentioned, my mother’s parents met in the US Marines during WW II. My grandmother left to have children and my grandfather did more duty in Germany, Japan, the Philippines and Korea. He was issued a Purple Heart and I don’t say that becuz I am proud I say it becuz it shows there is something in the DNA that makes it so my line will get up and take action in the trenches when others are either pissing themselves, frozen with fear or running away. This streak of militancy shows itself in every generation and if not properly managed thru some sort of commitment to a military type lifestyle, results in my family members getting into trouble. They are also talented artists who seem not allowed to express themselves-another ticking time bomb type person. That is alot of primitive power to keep under pressure.

My uncle was born first in 1948 and then my mother in 1950. My aunt came in 1955 due to my grandfather being overseas for a time. She is a Catholic, he was a Lutheran then converted for her sake. I was never baptized per my mothers choice and except for the foster home where Christianity was pushed, religion was not a part of my mother’s upbringing of me, except for stories about abusive nuns in her school days. 1950’s Irish Catholic nuns and the system sounds like it made a penitentiary look like a vacation.

My mother was supposedly born with ailments according to my grandmother, not my mother.
My mother had problems with her tonsils and in the 1950’s at a young age, infancy I believe my mother was brought to Bethesda Naval Hospital in Bethesda Maryland, USA. According to her, doctors used experimental radiation treatments on her including radium suppositories and treatments where my grandmother was asked to where a lead apron over her uterus but nothing was done to shield my mothers female organs as an infant.
The tonsils grew back and had to be removed.
My mother tells of a horrible ordeal where they lied to her and snuck up on her with something full of a knock out drug and put it over her face to get her ready for surgery. She excuses this ordeal by saying “That is just the way they did it back then”.
My mother seems to have gone thru much medically over the years.
My grandmother also has a horrifying story about doctors trying to get phlegm out of her lungs by filling them with water and she always told me this story about she can never forget that she could not breath..due to pneumonia she had to have half of her lung removed.

My mother was severely abused by her family and the main perp was her father.

I found this out not from her, she has always kept her life a mystery from me for the most part.
I found this fact out when I went to meet my fathers family after contacting dad’s mother had sisters and they were more than happy to be hateful and just dump this information in my lap about my mother.
She told me she never wanted me to know and upon recalling certain stories of abuse she could recall them, then 20 minutes later would say she could not remember.
My family are typical of the controlling, dysfunctional environment that goes along with severe abuse and its members living in denial and being dissociative.

As far as I am concerned I have enough to at least show good cause for my own research.
Intergenerational abusive family,not only with military connections (which I never thought were important before) but a connection directly to the very facility that is associated with MK Ultra and radiation human experimentation.

In 1995 my mother was starting to understand her own situation and she was trying as best she could to get help. She was frustrated but eventually she claimed to have found helpful people at the Dept. of Energy. She was told there was a class action lawsuit. She later claimed that after all that hard work, she dropped her part in the class action lawsuit BECAUSE SHE WAS FOLLOWED. I also see that when she lived in a condo in Dracut MA there were noisy neighbors that were just out of line yet the condo association would do nothing and the police would do nothing. The boy who made the noise upstairs with his mother was supposedly in some local gang(!)…

Also, growing up over the years, my mother was in numerous car crashes and seems to always have been terrorized or given a hard time. She is very tall, buxom and was very pretty so fair enough she will get picked on.

Over the years she has had a very hard time and she sticks with her abusive birth family. They are bonded and I never understood why she did not leave the original abusers. I now understand that her damage is so severe from a young age that she is controlled moreso than I ever will be.
I am not afraid of being followed or any thing else for that matter.

My mothers family were also involved with crime when I was growing up. My mother claims that there was an incident with the FBI cornering her at a young age and also that in later years when a bartender she dated diplomats sons.

My own life has consisted at abuse while at that foster home. I never had any memories before the age of 6 years old.

I also have had a hard life and it seems I was always getting hit by cars or having ‘bad luck’ and people being really nasty to me growing up and into adult hood.

In my early 30’s I started to really question why a family of attractive, tall,athletic, artistic intelligent people were losers in life and so beat down.

After years of research I finally realized that mind control slavery sounded very familiar and that it fit the same patterns. In my 30’s I began to notice extra ordinary abilities like photo memory, a part of my mind like a huge filing system, extremely good recall of text and audio and visual as well better vision than most people and a psychic ability.

As I went thru this I began to get harassed and stalked and I experienced suicide programming in three layers.
Other things were going on but I will get into it later.
I tried to get help but the general actions of those around me was either to write me off (and warn me that I was going to be driven crazy-the best my friends could do I guess) or to try to help terrorize me.
A psychologist I asked about getting hypnotized said ” That would bring up much memory for you” and discouraged me from doing it.

I have been neglected, marginalized and terrorized across the country.

No one wants to know and anyone who helped sell me out or add to the slander or negative PR campaign has been rewarded.

I only want to write my story for other targets and survivors, then end my life. I have lost too much and everyone is so out of it connected to this, they cant figure out why I cant ‘get a life’.


~ by onmc on December 24, 2008.

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