Amend last post

I want to add to that last post.  It occured to me afterwords that I dont know for sure, as I often do not know who is friend or foe. Angelina Jolie and her husband may be targeted themselves and thats why they were smart enough to get the hell out of here and reside abroad, and Donald Trump might any kind of person I dont know. I also recall getting alot of heat for pointing out once to someone that he has that gift that many great successful business people have which is to say anything they please but somehow never be caught for saying it. Its a con’s tongue and its a gift one is born with.  I often catch things that other people dont due to before being heavily targeted, I had brought myself out of the daily brainwash or the mediascape.  An interviewer was with Trump and trying to help him sound coherent as he is obviously smart but its not his job to be a glossed over communicator.  His statements were a bit to honest in these moments and one of his comments would have been shocking- had it been noticed by viewers. The fact that it seemed to fly right over people’s heads was amazing to me. I cant tell if he has this gift on his own or he gets a bit of help from somewhere on high.. I found it fascinating anyway.

I cant help but be a bit fond of Trump even though I am not fond of his lifestyle or the things he does, becuz I like money, used to work among people with money and any guy who  actually appreciates natural beauty has to be genuine somewhere. Who knows anymore. And I dont understand why he doesnt like Angelina but its nice to hear some criticism of her looks instead of the common people’s blind admiration for her.

For any of these famous people to be hounded like they are nowadays its just disgusting really. Its been ridiculous for a decade or so…when is it going to end?  The insanity, the corporate prison the culture lives in?  I hope there is this big backlash, though I will be too old to enjoy it most likely.  Imagine that- the whole big ugly machine that they have built around humanity, just melting away from the same boredom and neglect and self interest that built it in the first place, over civility, taste, style and a culture of privacy.

I dont know what happened. I did so many things today, something changed things drastically. I wrote that last post, reviewing that ridiculous movie, I scanned the rest of my records I came upon last week (that had been sitting there for 3 years in an envelope in a mailbox)….I did start a piece of research that was very hard for me to do. I am putting something together that is very difficult to face, and I had put it together years ago. But to a compartmentalized mind one that is being gang stalked and harassed, you’ll keep on compartmentalizing to survive, so the info you have collected though perhaps put together mentally, cannot be assembled and manifested into the physical world. I just wonder if this is the truest purpose of ‘ gang stalking’- to keep a person like a survivor of mc or programming silenced.

I felt like someone handed me my soul back today. There was not all that suffering. No burning, no feeling of something missing or having been ripped away from me, no torture.  I feel much more in line with the old me, the Real Me my true Self, I also feel in step with a true timeline…not the original one but something seems back in balance again.

The other day, like day before yesterday, so that would be Monday, I was being so tortured that I took the battery out of my phone and my friend from SD who keeps a close watch on me via phone actually called the cops due to me not calling for all day and night. I cant blame him with me in this situation.  By the time I called he was upset and I cant blame him. But I was getting totally sucked into whatever the system is here, its very insidious.  The ONLY reason I came out of it and shook it off was that it rained again and thunder stormed.  This is also occuring tonight, except no rain or thunder, just a cloud off in the distance with lightning.  I wonder if that in itself is providing relief.  I suppose if I feel messed up again tomorrow I will have my answer.
That day was horrible. I was so depressed by everything and sinking. My confidence was pretty much gone. I was buying into the no one is going to believe me negative ideations and got so brainwashed at one point that I was ready to write a post stating that ‘America got exactly what it deserved on 9-11’, real desperate and angry sentiment like that. I am glad that something kept me from posting as well as lying down in a park down the street in a catotonic state almost was broken up by the storm. It cleared my state of mind. Also the cops drove by me, perhaps due to my friend calling and after they did I mysteriously felt morale get a bit better, but due to fighting so hard I wasnt going to let that effect me. I dont like being lied to and manipulated.

I hope I feel better today due to some action I took not just an electrical storm. But if that keeps being the case repeatedly it validates my theory that thunder or electrical storms mess up whatever tech is in use, or some other explaination connected to the weather conditions, but that effect is pretty extreme. If it did not rain and thunder a few days ago I dont know what would have happened.

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~ by onmc on July 21, 2010.

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