Halloween Difficult For RA Survivors

A very big holiday is coming in a few days. For some of you its difficult and for some its always been the best day of the year..or I should say Nov 1st is the best day. My two favorite holidays have always been Halloween and my birthday.

All holidays outside of these can be difficult with Xmas being the worst for me traditionally.

My biggest problem is during Halloween I have this urge to have relations but not just with any male it has to be someone just right. The man whom my body craves on Oct 31st, every year has been out of my life since 2003 really but officially since 2004 or 5 I forget which. This is one of the cruelest parts of RA and targeting a survivor of RA or ritual backround. What they did to put me in an eternal trap I cant get out of is use a man I fell in love with against me. To end my life with his departure and betrayal- to ensure that I never move on from that when by all rights I should have been able to move on by now keeps me trapped in the past. This was done on purpose by the system that keeps Targets down and under control. Silenced.

My life was totally destroyed and him leaving was a reference point for that. This system has made it impossible to move on so my past keeps me in a mental and emotional prison. Which this system has designed it to do.

As I sink lower lately it becomes more obvious that this system is unbeatable. Tonight for some reason there has been relief like I have never felt before in years. I havent felt this good since perhaps 2002 was the last year I had any normalcy. Really since 1995. 1996 is when the panic attacks started and other physical symptoms which I have come to realize all change when I move to different locations. From my experience and research as well as the testimonies of other targets they were most likely targeting the house I was in. For this to start happening along with the first overt gang stalking tactics by perps in person as well as it being during my mother being intimidated and threatened out of going to the Pres Advisory Committee on Radiation Experiments I would say that one can deduce it has to do with the radiation experimentation. The timing is right. What is interesting is the connections that seem to exist to ritual abuse as well as programming.

The reason targets are hit so hard is that whoever is behind this does not want any victim witnesses coherent enough to put it all together in a sensible manner and expose this to the public. Anyone who knows too much or gets to close is dubbed a threat and driven crazy. They are hunted, guilted, treated like criminals and put through terrorism as well as basically abducted into severe behavior modification programs, which can now take place in public spaces.

I don’t know why I have relief just now. It doesn’t surprise me that this is occurring during Halloween. Perhaps the gang stalking system takes a break during this holiday an especially long break. I don’t recall how past Halloweens have been I could look it up I suppose from my writings.

I also notice that there is one of those lights in the sky that shines during an important opening of something. It could have to do with something going on in town also. I know it all sounds totally insane or like I’m nuts but I don’t even address that as most Targets have something that is important enough, whether they know it or not, to get them silenced in such a severe way or driven to suicide. And much of what TI’s claim is totally feasible with the progress in technology.
I have noted such things as far as what seems like mass mind control in the past. Whenever the public is supposed to spend money or feel free to party or enjoy themselves, now that I am so sensitive to such changes I notice that these things change or are made possible by what seems like mass mind control in use. Such as during that last holiday, Labor Day I believe it was, I noticed that it was really made possible by a change in what seems like a total control over the masses via mind control, most likely technologies.

This is what makes being believed about any of this difficult, most citizens would rather not believe that thier lives were run by outside forces in such a way. It’s easier to dismiss a minority of people than to accept that such a system might possibly exist. Now that is just in the Boston area I have experienced that. The beauty of all this is that every state seems to be different, every city and every town. Some cities exhibit varying effects in different parts of that city or metro area.
This is the basis for the great NWO or world peace. Just as other activists have said, usually survivors of mind control, there is no peace under mind control (Cathy O’brien said this in one of her vids). I completely agree. I think the idea for the public however is that, unlike people who have lived under internal programming all thier lives, the general public don’t really know any better so it’s no harm to them.
That may be true but what is more sinister is H.W. Bush’s connection to big pharma through Lily. One wonders how much of what we see as mental illness and disorders are induced in this way.

The greatest problem is either becoming so distraught that you are suicidal or very strange things can occur such as possession. Sexual activity with no obvious source. The best thing to do is just to get through it using your instincts. Much of this is normal for many European pagan beliefs of our ancestors. These powers seem to be harnessed and perverted by RA. The Survivorship sight is helpful during these holidays. At least you know yer not alone.

I know that by all rights I should have moved onto another Lord by now- a new God to my Godess or however you want to put it but the gs system is such nasty psychological warfare that it has used my connection to this male to imprison me for years. Eventually when I am freed up from the bonds of the past I am sure I will clean house and set everything straight.

This is what the system does not want you to do it seems. To get well, to get free or get healed especially with any connection to your own free Will.


~ by onmc on October 29, 2010.

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